Go knee

Swelling is down some and I was able to bend pretty well at PT today. It was my last session with Dina as she is going on maternity leave and I am really hoping I am done by the time she comes back in three months.

I undoubtedly walked a bit more then Melissa would have liked, but I was able to bend my knee while doing it, though I am still throwing my hip a bit. While I know what I have to do to get better, I can't completely give up my life or I lose half the purpose in getting better. And I hooked up to the Game Ready as soon as I got home.

The fun part of my day involved confusion with my insurance. Here's a conundrum for you that I'm not sure I will ever fully understand. When I got to PT I was told I had no more authorized sessions. I have been diligent in keeping track and knew this was supposed to be the final session from my last approval. But here's the rub, if I get an authorization for four sessions, but my re-evaluation is done during my third session and the insurance approves another group of sessions before I have actually had the fourth session from the first authorization, I lose that session. So, if my new authorization is for four more sessions, instead of having eight sessions, I get seven.

Is this some sort of new math? How do I lose a PT session because I have been approved for more PT? My brain hurts from trying to find the logic in this. And we don't need health care reform?!

Brrr!

I had to run, okay hobble, to the bank and store this morning. I think all the fluid causing the swelling in my knee froze in the short time I was out. Very happy to be tucked back home for the rest of the day!

A very special thank you to ET for an amazing birthday present that really helps me stay positive and look towards the future - not to mention push myself to get my knee bending and walking ASAP!

As for the rest of it, business as usual. Still some pain, but got up to 100 degrees on the CPM this morning - hopefully can do it this afternoon too.

Older, Wiser . . . and Calmer

Dina pushed me fairly hard in physical therapy this morning, but at least I was able to do it. The swelling is still there and Dina says it may take another 2 to 3 weeks for it to subside. I have lost mobility, before the manipulation I was bending to 95 degrees on the wall and 93 degrees on the table, now I am at 83 degrees on the wall and 75 degrees on the table (practically hyperventilating and making pained noises to get there).

Melissa called while I was in PT and said that they couldn't have predicted my knee's reaction and that I seem to be having some of the worst reactions to the surgery. (Something to be proud of?)

Right now, I'm just working on letting it go. That's my birthday wish - to let go of the negativity. In the grand scheme of things, this is just a few miles on the road of life, much better stretches in front of me and I need to focus on that!

Shh, Don't Tell

For the first time since Thursday, I left my apartment.

There are certain necessities in my life, food for myself and the cats and kitty litter rank fairly high among them. So I snuck across the street and filled those needs. Came home and went back on the Game Ready (which does not seem to be helping the swelling).

And all this machine time is still not helping me bend my knee when I walk, or sit. In fact, the icing seems to make me loose mobility every time I use it, especially after a CPM session.

Combine that with again realizing that I can't go out to dinner for my birthday tomorrow night, and we all know who should be getting coal in their stockings for the rest of their Christmases!

72 Hours Later Still Cranky

I was finally starting to walk like a normal person again. Yes, stairs were still beyond me, but I was often walking the 14 1/2 blocks to and from Physical Therapy. At worst, I would have to periodically pop a Tylenol for the pain.

Today, it still barely bends when I am trying to walk and is now the size of a slightly deflated soccer ball. My thigh muscle hurts and sitting at the computer I still can't get my leg to bend beyond 15 degrees. On the CPM I can get my knee to an uncomfortable 90 degrees.

I just remain stuck on the fact that it would have taken less then 5 minutes to explain that there was a very good possibility that my knee would react like this. Dr. Williams may be a great surgeon, but what does that matter if patients' are left without all the information - don't assume we know what questions to ask (though from now on I will definitely have to start with what is the worst that could happen?). And it would also be helpful if staff would listen to me when I question doing this during the holidays!

If I knew then, what I know now!

I remember this routine

Good representation of how I feel right now.

It may have a slight twist of a new machine, but I remember this routine. Up in the morning, Game Ready (ice) the knee while I eat breakfast and take my pills; head back to bed to watch DVD's while strapped to the CPM machine; back to the Game Ready - half an hour on, an hour off until it's time for the afternoon CPM; more icing; dinner and pills; more icing; bed so I can get the sleep to do it all again tomorrow.

My knee still looks like a soccer ball and on it's own won't bend past 5 degrees, but on the CPM I'm up to 70 degrees. Melissa has this grand scheme that I am supposed to move up 10 degrees every day. That's great, I just need it to translate into bending when I am not attached to a machine doing all the work.

And I Hate Melissa Too

I am looking for suggestions for a new knee doctor, and yes, they have to be in the United States and in my general vicinity. Even though I am not done with all the follow-up from this surgery I simply feel I need a new doctor with better ability to offer full disclosure without my having to guess or send multiple e-mails asking questions. They can even be at the same hospital - that would certainly make transferring files easier.

When I was having problems setting up the post-manipulation schedule Melissa wanted I asked if I could postpone the procedure to after the holidays. I was told no. It's my fault for not pushing harder. Had anyone ever mentioned that a possible side-effect of the manipulation would be a knee the size of a soccer ball and losing mobility, I would have insisted I not do this two days before Christmas.

I have cried more in the last 12 hours then I have since my mother died. Last night, in pain and fear when a cat climbed up my leg. This morning when Melissa basically told me that this was my fault for stopping at the supermarket across the street from my building for maybe 10 minutes on my way home from the hospital yesterday and basically made it clear it is Christmas Eve and why am I bothering her. And just now, when I realized there was there was no way to comply with Melissa's directions to get my knee better and go to Christmas dinner. I don't have any immediate family left, and now I don't get to spend the holiday with friends, but alone strapped to stupid machines. (Yes, the CPM has returned to my life and now an icing machine.)

I went to Physical Therapy today and they wouldn't even touch me I was so swollen. We tried to let gravity work again and still didn't get much past 10 degrees. Basically, I have lost serious mobility because Dr. Williams felt he knew best and no one bothered to share anything but the rosy outcome. It shouldn't be too much to ask somebody to give me full disclosure. Obviously Dr. Williams' is too important to follow-up with most of the post-operative care, that's why he has Melissa. (Yes, I'm being somewhat facetious, but then I don't know his reasoning.) But I shouldn't have to guess what the worst possible outcome or side effects might be (i.e. a non-working knee), nor should I have to consult another Orthopedist to even know what questions to ask.

So if you know an Orthopedist who works on knees and is capable sharing information with the patient I can have my files ready before the ball drops in Times Square.

Bah Humbug

Something is wrong with my knee. This is different then anything else I have been through.

I managed not to call the hospital when I started crying at 3:30 am after a cat walked on my knee. But I didn't get much sleep after that. Even got up and iced it - didn't help. The added bonus of my night is that I found the epidural spot would start to hurt if I lay on my back to long, and I couldn't get my knee really comfortable on my side. And my knee wouldn't even bear the passive weight of lying on my stomach.

There is a hard swollen lump the diameter of a softball on the outside of my knee reaching up towards my femur. Is 6:30 am too early to call the hospital?

I'm going to go ice some more and see if I can hold off calling until 8 am.

Happy Holidays

I Hate Dr. Williams!

"I'm not happy with how far you're bending" he says. "I want you to let me force it" he says. "You come in to the hospital, I knock you out and I can bend it to 140 degrees" he says.

About nine hours after the procedure, my knee is swollen, red, painful, and won't even bend 5 degrees. And I am supposed to start back on the CPM and have PT tomorrow! This is me sticking out my tongue and blowing a raspberry in the general direction of my surgeon.

I stopped writing after my one month anniversary. I figured it had been a month, I should be better by now. I stopped using the brace 10 days before my 2 month anniversary. Yes, I had problems. I had to stop PT for awhile when a suture site on my knee wouldn't heal fully and kept spot bleeding. And I had a number of issues with swelling. But lately I have been able to walk with relatively little pain, though some stiffening. I have been diligent about PT, both during appointments and home. But the scar tissue seemed to be blocking my bending progress from going at the desired rate.

I had gone to see Dr. W. for the arthritis flaring in my other knee. And that's when he mentioned manipulation. (I think it was just payback for a comment I made about a certain sports team and their dismal season!)

Naively, I agreed. So two days before Christmas, with most of the snow scooped off the streets, off I went to the hospital, I even took a loaf of my pumpkin walnut bread as a holiday gift for his staff. I worked very hard at being perky and positive. Instead of an operating room I went to the recovery room where I was lightly put under, while the nice anesthesiologist administered the epidural. I woke up an hour later unable to move anything below my waist and wondering if it was done. It wasn't. I got another shot in my IV while he bent it three times to a grand total of 135 degrees. (See even my knee has a stubborn streak and he missed his goal by 5 degrees.)

I was in some pain and couldn't figure out how he got my knee to bend that far, as it was felling a bit traumatized and wouldn't go much past about 40 degrees for me. I was able to walk, first with a walker, then a cane, and even on my own. When we got back from the hospital I was even able to walk around the supermarket. But when I got home and sat on the couch, my knee screamed in protest when I asked it to bend - causing me to yelp a bit. I have been icing and took my pills. Neither of which seem to be helping.

Basically, I feel like I have taken a huge step backwards. Instead of spending the holidays in on warm sunny beach or a snowy one in Maine, I get to spend Christmas Eve and my birthday with Dina, my physical therapist. (By the way, my birthday is Monday - large presents and trips to exotic locales are always appreciated!)

I think everyone can agree that a raspberry is fairly mild compared to what I could be sending Dr. Williams way!